Am I Safe?November 9, 2016
My heart was racing. My breathing was uneasy. For hours, I had no peace.
Two hours of sleep was all my body would give me before I woke up gasping and rolling over to pray the anxiety attack away. It didn’t leave me. My body was tense. My breathing became choppy, only slowing and evening out long enough for me to have another anxiety attack.
When you’re an empath, you feel everything. I have felt the anger, sadness, fear, confusion, and dismay of millions of people around the world within the last two days. Every single one pierces my heart. Every worry and question of safety, ever fear for one’s own life and the lives of family members has echoed in my ears.
I hate the uncertainty this election has left me with. I had concern going into it. Now that it is over, all I have are more questions, more concerns.
What do I tell the beautiful Black babies in my family?
How do I protect them from the messages this election sent us?
Will my friends be put on a watch list?
Will my friends lose their health insurance?
Am I safe?
A trans woman who served this country had her car burned as she slept inside her house with her toddler son. They lived 30 minutes away from me.
I have no answers. I have rage, pain, and fear. But I have no answers.
All I have are the overwhelming and convoluted range of emotions that millions of people across America are feeling.
Echoing Ida is a home for Black women and nonbinary people committed to telling our truths. If you have a post-election reflection or analysis to share, please submit it to email@example.com.